Rise and Shine

When I see your messages pop up on the screen, I should be excited.
But I'm not.

Holding your hand has been sweet. Knowing someone wants me. It has been sweet.

But I don't think about you with that gentle excitement beneath my ribcage. And I don't long to see you the way you say you miss me. Or in the way I feel I'm supposed to. Sharing my thoughts with you has been wonderful. Watching the movies with you has been perfect.

But we can do that without the added pressure of the things we are not saying.
And when you do.... did... say them. Without the silence I have as an answer.

I don't want to hurt you.

Especially when she wants you back. And I want someone else.

You were happy with her. And she was happy with you.

I'm just not the one.

I'm not sure how to tell you.